I'm not a person with a lot of regrets.
There, I said it.
But with my Awakening journey, there's one thing I wish I'd done differently.
Like many others, when I Awakened I really had no support. So after the acute symptoms subsided, I stumbled along for 2 more years before I made any real headway in integrating my experience.
There's ONE thing that I could have done to help me make sense of what was happening.
This one, easy weekly practice would have kept me more grounded in the whole experience and allowed faster progress through my internal changes.
What's more, it could have kept me going when times got tough or when I felt really alone in my process.
Sure, I did daily Morning Pages (writing 3 pages of free associations each morning). But this practice only kept me mired in the minutia of my everyday thoughts and emotions.
While it did help me to get my anxiety out through writing, it didn't help me integrate my experience or make sense of it.
For that, you need a little distance.
Looking back, what I wish I'd done is record my realizations, insights, synchronicities, my wins and challenges BY THE WEEK.
Doing this one simple thing would have given me not only a record of my Awakening journey for posterity, it would have helped me see more easily the larger themes and patterns that were coming up for me to heal, and that could have given me some encouragement when I was feeling most desperate.
That's because when you have a neat list of all the things that you're working on at an internal level, you can relate back to them with more detachment, without getting caught up in the process as much.
Plus you can see just how far you've come. It always feels good to acknowledge your small wins.
Recording your Awakening journey through a blog, vlog, spreadsheet, scrapbook or bullet journal is an amazing way to capture your inner process.
I'm sure that if I had done this many moons ago, I'd made better sense of my Awakening as a whole.
Because one thing we all have in common during Awakening, even though no one has the exact same experience, is that you can get lost in it and not see the forest for the trees.
Especially if you're working with racing thoughts, health problems, a lot of anxiety and essentially the Tower Card as your life as you knew it prior to Awakening starts to BLOW UP.
Keeping a detailed macro account of your major accomplishments gives you a big picture of your journey. You can reflect on the lessons that come your way and see themes that resurface and spiral back, over and over.
If you don't know that your themes are supposed to come back like this, it can be pretty discouraging. Only after you've been on the Ascension Path for some time do you see the patterns emerging.
You might end up like me, shaking your fist at the sky, going, "I thought I dealt with this. Why is it back AGAIN?!"
But if you have a record, you'll start to see patterns and you'll begin to realize that you're working with layers.
You can see how 2 months ago you had a problem with putting other people's needs before your own, and this month AGAIN a similar drama has manifested.
You will CLUE IN that this is in fact a spiritual lesson coming back for deeper, more sincere introspection.
Adding details like how you handled the drama last time can even help you decide how you want to handle it this time around. Plus, it will help you re-program your beliefs and automated reactions a lot quicker.
So I urge you to document your Awakening in some way.
My suggestion is a weekly record so you can get some distance. For Blue Morpho clients, I offer them my Self-Mentoring Weekly Progress Report that they can curate to their liking.
The point of keeping a short weekly blog entry or vlog is to help you from getting caught up in the tiny details as they're happening and going down those rabbit holes.
Instead of writing 3 pages on the fight you just had with your mother and how that made you feel, at the end of the week you just record what the fight was about, what triggered it, and what you realized about it by the end of the week, after a few days have passed.
By keeping to a weekly summary form, you reflect on the wins and challenges of the week with a bird's eye view. It takes very little time and you're more likely to stick with it, too.
Here's an example of what a weekly summary could look like if you're using a simple Bullet Form.
Week of May 1st-7th
meditation: 4 days
disengaged from a fight with Dad instead of allowing him to get to me. Realized that his constant interference and criticism is actually about his need to be in control all the time.
idea for a new painting came while I was in the park. See sketch
Told Alex the truth about how I feel about his drinking around me. It felt awful when I did it but now I'm feeling better.
anxiety level for the week: 8/ 10
dreamt about losing my driver's license again and my ex driving my car
pressure in 3rd eye chakra most of the week and some strobing
That's just an idea of the kinds of notes you can jot down to help you tweak your goals and your self-care routines, for instance, for the week ahead. You can go back into your notes months later and see your progression in real time. It's pretty neat.
Do you record your Awakening journey in some way? Are you recording it at a micro or macro level? Please share with us in the comments.
With love on your journey